Why am I mummy Kryptonite to my little Superman?
I’ve heard other parents say similar things. Why do we hear reports our kids being little angels for everyone else ( gran, nanny, au pair, nursery carers ) but all hell breaks loose as soon as mummy or daddy walk in the door? Ok the good news is, this is normal. Great.
Charlie's grandparents, my au pair and nursery carers all have faces of amusement and astonishment when Charlie changes from a serene well behaved little boy to a crying moaning mess on the floor when I arrive. Yes, hilarious. I mean really? Just slightly painful to deal with right? But it is a sign that his deep affection and love is for his parents. Phew. I feel better.
Here are 4 reasons why, and what we can do now to help cope with it:
1. He’s only 3!
Don’t take it personally. Charlie loves hanging out with his Gran and at nursery, but it takes a lot of energy for him to be well behaved all the time. When he’s with us he’s his true 3 year old self ( god help us. ha! ) and he needs to let it all hang out. He’s human after all. So I choose to now leave him be and wait for him to come to me when he’s ready to chat about his day.
2. He’s punishing me.
Separation anxiety comes in all forms. Even if Charlie is happy to go out and about without me, he does still miss me during the day. The meltdown is a bit like payback for leaving him. I remind Charlie now and say simple things like ‘I will see you after nursery’, so he understands that I’m not going away and I will be there for him.
3. He’s starving.
A real obvious one. He needs a snack mid afternoon, like us, his sugar levels also dip around 3pm and tiredness creeps in. A little healthy snack makes a world of difference to his mood, so I always have them handy when I collect him, no matter what time of the day.
4. He needs to bond.
Charlie becomes jealous of the extra attention baby Cooper needs. So I try to have more one to one time with Charlie which helps immensely. I love to exercise with my kids. Charlie especially loves lying all over me when I do my morning stretches. He’s a real little wrestler and loves the cuddles and the closeness, so I encourage it fully. He seems happier to leave the house in the morning without me, and loves to kick a ball outside after nursery. Active engagement keeps his meltdowns at bay. Click here to see how much Charlie enjoys workouts with his mummy.
Do you have similar experiences with your toddler too? Would love to hear about what you do to cope with it. Please comment below!